Are you afraid to be seen?

This weekend on my run, something hit me, not physically (thankfully), but energetically.

I realized I am shrinking again. As a new business owner, showing up on social media pushes every edge of my comfort zone.

Not because I don’t have clarity. Not because I don’t have something to say.
But because… I am afraid to be seen.

And I know I’m not alone in that.

The fear of being seen is sneaky. It shows up in the most high-performing, outwardly confident people.

You check all the boxes. You’ve built the career. You lead the meetings.

But deep down? There’s still a voice that says:
“What if they judge me?”
“What if I’m too much?”

Not just in what I say, BUT in who I am.

I’ve been told I speak too fast. That I walk too confidently. That my presence is too strong for the room.
That my Southern accent sounds unpolished.
That wearing suits and ties as a woman is “weird.”
That I should soften my voice, my walk, my words if I want to be accepted.

I’ve been told I’m too heavy. Then too thin.
That being a vegetarian is inconvenient for others.
That my face shows too many expressions and that I should consider Botox.
That my grey hair is peeking through again, and I should color it more often.
That I look tired, so I probably need a better concealer.

And while I’m deeply confident in my training, credentials, and lived experience, I am a beginner when it comes to connecting through social media.

I didn’t grow up in front of the camera.
I don’t have a highlight reel or a perfect aesthetic. I don’t know how to use filters and get the best angles or lighting.
And in a world of polished influencers, I sometimes wonder how I can compete when what I bring is substance and authenticity over soundbites.

These voices, internal and external, all whisper the same lie:
Who I am isn’t quite right and needs to be fixed before I can be seen, heard, or respected.

But here’s what I’m learning:
Every time I edit myself to fit someone else’s comfort zone, I drift further from the people I’m truly here to serve.

Because real leadership isn’t curated.
It’s felt.
And it starts by letting yourself be seen, exactly as you are.

That’s the fear I was running with this week until I asked myself:
What is it costing me to stay hidden?

Here’s what I know from both coaching and lived experience:

You don’t need to change who you are to be seen.
You need to trust who you are and lead from that place.

Real confidence doesn’t come from performing.
It comes from being deeply aligned with your values.

When your presence reflects what you truly believe,
you show up with clarity, courage, and conviction,
no matter the room you are in or the platform you are on.

That’s the kind of leadership that resonates.
Not because it’s perfect, but because it’s true.

When we lead from clarity, when our energy matches our values, we stop performing and start resonating. That’s what true visibility is.

It’s not about social media or speaking on a stage.
It’s about being fully present in your life, your work, and your purpose.

So I’ll ask you what I asked myself:

Where are you holding back out of fear?
And what might shift if you gave yourself full permission to be seen?